How to Transform Obstacles
I had heard from a neighbor that another neighbor was not happy with holiday decorations I had installed on our lamp posts around our common area. I had done so to bring cheer during our winter months. I had been encouraged and complimented by many other neighbors. I had mixed feelings.
The “offended” neighbor had actually taken down the decorations. My first reaction was, “What’s their problem?” Not my best self. I was coming from a background that if my intentions are good, it must be okay. Others should understand.
Upon reflection and a desire to turn a potential confrontation into a possible connection, I decided to meet the upset neighbor, having an open mind to learn her perspective. I changed my internal conversation and approached the situation with curiosity, not a dualistic right or wrong attitude, a default to which I have succumb easily in the past.
I was a bit nervous when I first approached her door, especially since one neighbor had warned me that, “She can be a bit difficult, if you know what I mean,” wishing me good luck. However, “she” had written a message on the lamp post with a kind request.
I knocked on the door, introduced myself, and asked how she was doing. I explained how I was here to learn her perspective on the holiday decorations. She offered an alternative to have blue and white colors in recognition of Hanukkah. I had no idea. What an easy fix. We agreed that I would purchase the ribbon and install it. By the way, it isn’t as easy to find these colors!
It was a wonderful interchange. A few days later, I received a beautiful bouquet of flowers with an invitation for us to have dinner together (once Covid restrictions allow for this.) I was pleasantly surprised.
I have been inspired by this experience and I hope you are as well and can take steps towards transforming obstacles into opportunities for connection.
For more information on communication, bias awareness, and conflict resolution visit www.tlcpathways.com