Lessons from the Rain
When rain comes pouring down, is that a good thing or not for you? When a recent rainstorm hit California over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend, I heard many share that although it made for more challenging travel plans, we needed the rain. We had had almost no rain for about six months.
Our perspective with rain and everything else is dependent on our experiences and how we think about them. Our daughter was born in the first year of a five year drought. She had had very little experiences with rain like stomping in puddles or wearing rain gear. One afternoon, while traveling along the highway on a stormy day, she asked why the rain would suddenly turn off and on. We were confused by her question at first, she then exclaimed, “There, it just did it again.” We had passed under a bridge!
Perspective taking in the moment can vary dramatically for each person’s point of view. With time, there is a benefit of potential reflection, offering a greater awareness of a situation. The ways in which we think about our past experiences can either help or hinder broader insights. With self-reflection, we can appreciate both our own point of view and that of another person.
When I catch myself having made a judgement and subsequently learn of another’s viewpoint, I’m reminded time again, not everyone thinks like me! Or has the same experience as me. What?!? Rationally, this makes sense, however, I continue to be stretched to expand my outlook.
When confronted with a conflict due to a clash in perspectives, I have found it helpful to ask inviting questions, with a sense of curiosity such as, “How does this make you feel?” or “For how long have you been feeling this way?” Or restate what your understanding of a situation is with, “I’m hearing that you are upset about…. Am I getting this right?” These questions offer the opportunity for beneficial clarification for myself and potentially for others as it can help them develop insight into their situation.
In order to connect with others, let’s move beyond our initial feelings or impressions. Consider avoiding a predictable thought pattern. Learn more about yourself as you discover a different vantage point.
Learn more about perspective taking and its importance in nurturing compassionate relationships within a conflict resolution workshop. Send an Email: pathways2tlc@gmail.com to set up a workshop.
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